31 October 2006

NO!

NONONONONONONONONONONONO
NONONONONONONONONONONONO
NONONONONONONONONONONONO
NONONONONONONONONONONONO
NONONONONONONONONONONONO
NONONONONONONONONONONONO
NONONONONONONONONONONONO
NONONONONONONONONONONONO
NONONONONONONONONONONONO
NONONONONONONONONONONONO

Posted by tocks! at 23:58

29 October 2006

wallflower

four days left
i should be afraid, very afraid.

cow girls don't have small heads.

Start flames to burn out
Start thinking out loud
Give me an ending
Then we'll stop pretending
If we stop pretending, we know where we're heading
'cause I said stop but I'm still spinning
They've said I've lost but I'm still winning
Burn quick and stand still
Speak slow to get though these words I couldn't say to you
I crack concrete falling down for you

Posted by tocks! at 11:04

28 October 2006

tenderness survives

i'm completely capable of wasting an entire evening AND night
by stoning, talking, and talking somemore.

don't eat go back grass
WAHAHHAS!
Qn: who's the king of all the stationery?
Ans: the ruler!

You ask me if I love you
And I choke on my reply
I'd rather hurt you honestly
Than mislead you with a lie
And who am I to judge you
On what you say or do?
I'm only just beginning to see the real you

we're sometimes too quick to judge
and then not change our opinions after the judgement sets in
but truth is, who are we to judge others
based on our little knowlege (imperfect knowledge in monopoly!)
what right do we have?

A hesitant prize fighter
Still trapped within my youth

Posted by tocks! at 12:22

27 October 2006

tongue tied

let the past pass us by
spin around in circles
while the clock ticks away
we'll all be okay, someday.

i like the feeling of laughing till you can't breathe
choking on your own air
and being more happy than you've been in an awfully long time

HEY YOU!
run away with me pretty pretty please
to a far far away place with no boys
and there we'll find our peace (:

sometimes the temptation of running away
just overwhealms your entire being.

If you wanna be happy
For the rest of your life,
Never make a pretty woman your wife,
So from my personal point of view,
Get an ugly girl to marry you.

A pretty woman makes her husband look small
And very often causes his downfall.
As soon as he marries her
Then she starts to do
The things that will break his heart.
But if you make an ugly woman your wife,
You'll be happy for the rest of your life,
An ugly woman cooks her meals on time,
She'll always give you peace of mind.

Don't let your friends say
You have no taste,
Go ahead and marry anyway,
Though her face is ugly,
Her eyes don't match,
Take it from me she's a better catch.

Say man.
Hey baby.
Saw your wife the other day.
Yeah?
Yeah, she's ugly.
Yeah, she's ugly but she sure can cook.
Yeah? Okay.

waahhahahs!
brainwash everyone to think the same!
say NO to stereotyped blonde dolls!

Posted by tocks! at 01:35

25 October 2006

wage your war

and the way it appears
it's only natural for anyone
to interpret it the wrong way
please, it's just not what it seems.

and everytime that thought flashes in my head
guilt just consumes me
and its not like the intended recipient will ever read this
but sorry anyway
i'm a bitch la, damnnit.

i really should be studying.

It's funny that you're calling me tonight
And yes I dreamt of you too

Posted by tocks! at 22:02

one way street

t o c k s ! says:
we're such weird pple
ant ; says:
HAHAHA
ant ; says:
i think it's normal ?
t o c k s ! says:
we're so weird that it's normal?
-
ant ; says:
but the whole point of a comfort zone, is to get comfortable!
-
this is exactly why i love you (:
for never judging when i want revenge
for listening to me complain about the same things
OVER AND OVER AGAIN
and for being stuck in the same comfort zone

Posted by tocks! at 01:43

24 October 2006

straightjacket feeling

i just got up at 1
from a fantastic 12.5 hours sleep
12.5 hours HAH! beat that (:
maybe that will decrease the fat hormones
by another errr 15% ! (:

it's raining outside
i like watching the rain

I AM SO DELUDED
and even though no one knows
I AM SO EMBARRASSED ):
damnn, five hours of joy
and realisation of the blatant truth.

I used to run in circles going nowhere fast.
I'd take one step forward and a two steps back.
Couldn't walk a straight line, even if I wanted to.
I wanna love somebody, love somebody like you.

Posted by tocks! at 14:25

23 October 2006

exodus

little mermaid is like a form of global propaganda
if there's even such thing anyway.
trying to brainwash us to think that we're in the best place that we can be
and that being human makes us very blessed.
okay, maybe we are.

i suppose its the small things that we overlook
and brush aside that really melt your heart.

in LLB's words
it's like finding something pretty in a jar of lies

There on the pavement, underneath the yellow moon
I think of you and just how easily we bruise
A folded address in my pocket, I have stopped
Trying to believe for you that the bottom didn't drop

Posted by tocks! at 19:45

; thank you

I dreamt that I went to Heaven and an angel was showing me around.
We walked side-by-side inside a large workroom filled with angels.
My angel guide stopped in front of the first section
and said, "This is the Receiving Section.
Here, all petitions to God said in prayer are received."
I looked around in this area,
and it was terribly busy with so many angels sorting out petitions
written on voluminous paper sheets and scraps from people all over the world.
Then we moved on down a long corridor until we reached the second section.

The angel then said to me, "This is the Packaging and Delivery Section.
Here, the graces and blessings the people asked for are processed
and delivered to the living persons who asked for them."
I noticed again how busy it was there.
There were many angels working hard at that station,
since so many blessings had been requested
and were being packaged for delivery to Earth.

Finally at the farthest end of the long corridor
we stopped at the door of a very small station.
To my great surprise, only one angel was seated there, idly doing nothing.
"This is the Acknowledgment Section," my angel friend quietly admitted to me. He seemed embarrassed "How is it that? There's no work going on here?" I asked.
"So sad," the angel sighed.
"After people receive the blessings that they asked for,
very few send back acknowledgments.

"How does one acknowledge God's blessings?" I asked.
"Simple," the angel answered.
"Just say, "Thank you, Lord."
"What blessings should they acknowledge?" I asked.
"If you have food in the refrigerator, clothes on your back,
a roof overhead and a place to sleep ...
you are richer than 75% of this world.
"If you have money in the bank, in your wallet,
and spare change in a dish, you are among the top 8% of the world's wealthy.
And if you get this on your own computer,
you are part of the 1% in the world who has that opportunity."
Also ...

"If you woke up this morning with more health than illness,
you are more blessed than the many who will not even survive this day.
"If you have never experienced the fear in battle,
the loneliness of imprisonment,
the agony of torture, or the pangs of starvation,
you are ahead of 700 million people in the world.
"f you can attend a church meeting without the fear of harassment,
arrest, torture or death, you are envied by,
and more blessed than, three billion people in the world.
"If your parents are still alive and still married, you are very rare.
If you can hold your head up and smile, you are not the norm,
you are unique to all those in doubt and despair."

Posted by tocks! at 19:36

22 October 2006

IT'S RAINING!!!
FINALLY, SAY NO TO HAZE! :D
everyone's oblivious to the obvious.
it's raining! (:

Posted by tocks! at 14:03

wings of emotion

Because that's what people do.
They leap, and hope to God they can fly,
because otherwise you just drop like a rock,
wondering the whole way down, why in the hell did I jump

well i sure hope god has a pair of wings ready for me
cos i'm definitely leaping now
grabbing hold on to chances that will not come by a second time
and giving life my best shot

in everyone's life story
there's always this untold chapter
of sad stories and memories
that we try to forget.
but ultimately, we always find our happily ever after.
it's just a matter of when isn't it?

Posted by tocks! at 13:04

21 October 2006

laws of nature

































today i'm grateful for ants and bings
whose little words, make my day (:

















my sister's way of expressing her undying devotion for me

Cause I built you a home in my heart,
With rotten wood, and it decayed from the start.

That a lifetime's not too long
To live as friends

Posted by tocks! at 20:49

lips of an angel

































replay please;
i need a moment of mindless camwhoring
and mindblowing fun

Posted by tocks! at 20:29

19 October 2006

of head versus heart

im blogging in the school library
when im supposed to be mugging up to 12 hours a day
like RWARR ):
so unproductive bleargghs.

here's to remind you today :
don't fall back, move on

You're so cute when you're slurring your speech,
But they're closing the bar and they want us to leave.

Posted by tocks! at 17:05

18 October 2006

slander and double speak

you don't know what you want till you know what you don't
and i know what i don't
so i suppose that settles it.

my progress is only about as fast as a slow moving vehicle
i need a breather ):
i feel like taking black and white photos
like photobooth photos!
or top model - the ugly side of modelling sort of shots
imagine a world without colours
so sad, yet so pretty.

Cup your mouth to compress the sound,
skinny dipping with the kids from a nearby town.
And everything that I said was true
as the flashes blinded us in the photobooth.

At times I'd like to break you
And drive you to your knees
At times I'd like to break through
And hold you endlessly

Posted by tocks! at 21:27

unglam.

i am tired
i want to sleep
i want to eat.
this is a completely redundant post

" natalie, you have a high hormonal level "
" yes, that one also "
that one = yours truly

It's really good to hear your voice saying my name
It sounds so sweet
Coming from the lips of an angel
Hearing those words it makes me weak
Let it die
I never wanna say goodbye
But girl you make it hard to be faithful
With the lips of an angel
It's funny that you're calling me tonight
And yes I dreamt of you too

Posted by tocks! at 00:03

16 October 2006

hard habit to break

i desperately would love to upload a whole bucket of photos
sadly, blogger refuses to cooperate
i've only managed to upload a max of 2 photos
after like 2935890348 tries
so i give up.
another day, when im free-er
i will make a collage (:

anyway, please send me photos everyone!
especially the teetwelvers.

i dont like the way i blog these days,
it's so conversational.
BLEARGHHHS.

3 weeks till the beginning of the end
and im trying to give the last lap my best shot.
best shot, and im free for seven months
seems like a pretty good deal

plead the fleeting moment to remain;
read it in MAN AND WIFE (hwing your book is inspiring lah!)
where it was used to describe photographs.
the act of capturing a moment in time
we don't remember days, we remember moments.
maybe thats why everyone's a camwhore these days.

Let him know that you know best
Cause after all you do know best
Try to slip past his defense
Without granting innocence
Lay down a list of what is wrong
The things you've told him all along
And pray to God he hears you
And pray to God he hears you

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life

As he begins to raise his voice
You lower yours and grant him one last choice
Drive until you lose the road
Or break with the ones you've followed
He will do one of two things
He will admit to everything
Or he'll say he's just not the same
And you'll begin to wonder why you came

special mention to the favourite song of the moment
who's offically made it to the top25 most played song (:
i like.

Posted by tocks! at 23:29

13 October 2006

i believe in you

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MARK! :D
introducing guest bloggers : frans and hun!!!

Its such a sad day! So many friends to keep so little time! = (
why does time pass so fast when u are at the best point of ur life?
So many fond memories to keep which we hope will stay as reality!
Today we graduate and complete another chapter of our life.
Just wanna say that all the little angels sent to me by God
which i call friends will always be close to my heart.
Thank you all who i have happily spent my two years with.
Good luck to u guys and hope we nv forget each other.
xoxo HUN !

HELLO WORLD. As everybody knows, today's an emo day.
It really saddens me to know that the 2 years I've spent in CJ is coming to a close.
Looking back, there were things I wished I didn't do and regretted doing.
But what's done is done, and there's no point in regretting and so life goes on.
Sorry to anyone I've offended!
I think happiness is, most of the time, a state of mind
and you choose whether you want to be happy.
So, for now at least, let's talk about HAPPY EVENTS!

As most of you have already known,
because of the public announcement made,
today was also MARK P.'S BIRTHDAY!
The earlier part of the day was spent giving Mark what he deserves;
a beating, make-up and cake on his face.
Details can be SEEN in the many pictures and videos taken during this ritual.
ASK ME FOR PICTURES!
The later part of the day was spent surprising Mark at his house.
I would like to think that it was a success and I really hope he liked it!

12 years and running buddy, not gonna let you off that easy know.
Hope you enjoyed your special day today.
Of course, made special by your special friends.
HAPPY 18TH BIRTHDAY MARK P!
Ok bye.
-SNARF

you know, i really will miss cj.
more of the people rather than the school itself
but nonetheless, noodle king and memorable memories (HAHA!)
will not be forgotten.
i've found some of the most special little people in cj
we may go our seperate ways
but like scars, these memories and people will always be there
and there's this special place in my heart reserved for them
lovely people (:
im very blessed indeed.

it's never easy to find friends
that you're completely comfortable with
in a way that you dont hold back any thoughts or feelings
such that you can just sit together without saying anything
and yet feeling completely at ease.
when a simple smile speaks endless words.
and in two years, i've found more than one.
friends that you want to spend your entire life with.
gosh, EMO OVERLOAD.

Follow your heart
Let your love lead through the darkness
Back to a place you once knew
I believe, I believe, I believe In you

Posted by tocks! at 22:40

12 October 2006

footsteps

today, we fought for the remnants of the kway teow
we had to split it by four bowls
just so we could all have our last taste of kwayteowdry ):
noodle king (:

i took two long walks to the grandstand
sat there, and stoned.
the trees look pretty pretty swaying
i'll miss the grandstand and the breeze.

the routine things we'll miss.
like dropping our bags at the canteen everyday
hello-ing to familiar faces
dashing down to town at six for dinner
and getting back just in time for night study
being early for every single geog lecture

so there wont another last official school day anymore
cj has left me with many new experiences
and even more friends that i hold close to my heart
two years, is just a mere moment in our lives
but it is a treasured moment,
one that we will think back on when society is done screwing us over
we'll think about days when we were younger, and more real.
when we had true friends to bum around with.

i'm done with emo-ing.

Being without you
Is all a big mistake
Instead of getting any easier
Its the hardest thing to take
Im addicted to you
Youre a hard habit to break

Posted by tocks! at 22:44

09 October 2006

true or false

im becoming an introvert
mark :
why now u so boring one
never talk abt anything one
haiz
last time talk so much
now like rag doll

i'm losing myself little by little
talking is becoming more of a chore
there's just nothing to say anymore.
i just want everything to be over
and to find myself again.

Posted by tocks! at 23:29

antecendents


http://community.livejournal.com/polaroide/

i like ferris wheels
they remind me of popcorn, candyfloss
the scent of lingering romance and growing pains in the air
it's like almost being there.
they speak of happy days (:

today is the beginning of the end.
no time to think back on the past two years
but i certainly enjoyed every moment of it.

stay awake with the sound of my voice
i'm restless from the silence in the air
i want to be somewhere i can see the roads
a place where everytime you breathe a wish comes true
i want to be where love is real
and memories of distant days come to life again

Posted by tocks! at 22:00

08 October 2006

venus

quoting from my compre
"still the findings are disturbing.
to accept that how we look matters,
when we have so little control over our appearance,
is difficult."

the mirror is a product of man's vanity
merely skindeep but
mirrors allow us to skim the surface of our existence
but apparently,the need to perfect our gene pool
has made us the superficial beings that we are today.
so maybe superficiality is inbuilt.

Step one you say we need to talk
He walks you say sit down it's just a talk
He smiles politely back at you
You stare politely right on through
Some sort of window to your right
As he goes left and you stay right
Between the lines of fear and blame
And you begin to wonder why you came

Posted by tocks! at 23:47

07 October 2006

my love is vengeance

slowly our paths diverge
i am sailing like a little boat!

mooncake day bbq later on
my mum invited like the entire kampong laa.
i wonder what mid autumn festival would be like
if we cant even see the full moon
i want to drink beer and get drunk (:

You wanna get in my world, get lost in it
Boy I'm tired of running, lets walk for a minute

all my teeth hurt today
especially the molars ):
i think ive got some gum disease
ouchh.

the competition was never fair

the moon hung over soho and I counted 16 stars
I pointed at the brightest one and said now that one's ours

Posted by tocks! at 17:19

05 October 2006

fly 'em out to spain

i just formulated my after a levels to-do list :

- learn how to bake yummylicious deserts (:
- buy pretty pretty charms and make accessories for myself! (and friends)
- make a paper mache piggybank
- dye the ends of my hair dark red (in my imagination, it looks good)

read this on letterstolovers :

tonight ralf and i went out to chinese food.
when the meal was over and we opened our fortune cookies,
he read his, then looked up at me.
i asked him what it said.
he replied, "marry the girl sitting across from you."
it really said you have a bright future.

so sweeet.

today is take a chill pill day at home! :D
so im just slacking.
S.L.A.C.K.

denial is like poisoned wine
you drink in its sweetness
and the lingering aftertaste on your tongue
but before you know it
the poison starts churning in your stomach
and wham, you're dead.

apparently, we thought wrong.

the opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference

You could be happy and I won't know
But you weren't happy the day I watched you go

Posted by tocks! at 21:12

02 October 2006

knackered.

incoherent thoughts are racing cars around my head :

jade is sucha mega bitch
LISTEN TO YOUR MAMAA ( translated please )
you always seem to understand, you know how i am.
geog homework ; untouched
i suck at maths
the haze is choking me
i like my weekend wallpaper; it's the one thing that keeps me going
and one by one, they were gone.
little man in my head, quit hammering at the walls
MY HEAD EFFING HURTS
free hugs please
incapable of putting it in words anymore.

when it comes undone, you're left with no one.
- man and boy

Posted by tocks! at 23:20