30 September 2006

balancing act

basically, that's how life has been
pools of sorrow and waves of joy.
there's something seductive about red stilettos
sex appeal ; 10

Images of broken light which dance before me like a million eyes

Posted by tocks! at 21:36

29 September 2006

hold on to this kite

you know, it's complicated.
my fuse is so short these days
that i get annoyed so easily
but thank god for the happy people

1. i'm amused by how bad you are at guessing, but it's like you really understand
2. you make me wanna stick around for good
3. every little word and action just makes my heart swell with joy
4. you're so clumsy its adorable
5. your presence on bad days contradicts your words
6. you're the blank canvas that i paint my feelings on
7. you'll always be there, and i thank god for that.

How could this be done
Your such a smiling sweetheart
Oh and your sweet and pretty face
In such an ugly way

Posted by tocks! at 22:41

28 September 2006

caress my soul

Roses are red
Some diamonds are blue
Chivalry is dead
But you're still kinda cute

i have no idea i survived a day like this one
its 1212pm
finally, happy new day

bad things come in threes
crummyness crankiness and grumpyness
together in a single day
along with irritating voices
and bitchy fights
all in a tensed atmosphere
i would like to runaway

a haircut will make all this better
actually all i need now is a satisfying long phone chat
and music blasting in the speakers

i am capable of intellectual nonsense
pants:
i want to forget
even though i'm kinda fine
pantsless:
hahahas forget comes when you forget to think about it lah
stop thinking about forgetting
thinking about forgetting wont help you to forget

the girl at the corner bench would like to call the police

How come everytime you come around
My London, London bridge, wanna go down

Posted by tocks! at 23:57

27 September 2006

vibrant darkness

and your words stung like tears on a fresh wound
but you know i'll take them in anyway.
i suppose people do change and i'll accept you pointing it out
it might just be a wakeup call
but do know that whatever you claimed it to be
is not something i delibrately put myself through
i somewhat appreciate this though
it's never easy to tell the painful truth to a friend.

tension's on high alert! ):

a palm tree costs $12.60
you make me laugh :D
just stop singing that song please.
hahahs!

it was so sadly funny.

stand in line for days and nights
making up for lost time

Posted by tocks! at 00:11

26 September 2006

galaxy of insanity

my dad looked into my room
and thought that i was the sleeping person
and that the person he waved to was my friend
err actually, it is me.
hahahs!

i've accomplished my personal mission impossible
i read a slash fic and actually enjoyed it
too sweet, SUGAR OVERLOAD

some words just tug at your heartstrings
and refuse to let go
i dont know if i should laugh or cry
somehow im beginning to understand the turmoil that draco must have felt
torn between lovers and enemies, YEOWCH.

i need to know about the cat.

Something the heart must have to cherish,
Must love and joy and sorrow learn;
Something with passion clasp, or perish
And in itself to ashes burn.

Posted by tocks! at 00:42

24 September 2006

demented

shoutout to ELFIE :
you have more than my heart too.
im not there enough
but you know, happiness is just a phonecall away! :D

holland v (:
i love icecream and waffles
and i want to play more JI KO PAH!
im deprived of childhood games ):
i suppose the best part of getting high
is that you can do whatever you want to without being plagued by a sense of guilt.
singing at the top of our lungs at the busstop
when the clock ticks past twelve
is just, happying (:

the words just stay jumbled up in my head
desperate to be stringed into sentences
but somehow, they just get increasinly tangled
and the knotted words just begin to occupy more brainspace
I MISS YOU
mj session! :D
okay i seriously suck at the game
but ehhh, I SENT OUT WARNINGS!
dont blame me for being a handbrake.

this is depressing
today is sunday night, 11.07pm
as of tomorrow my life ends.
no more mopping around i shall get started.
i hate regrets, and im not giving myself a chance to regret
i will do well for A levels.

This time its done
It'll never feel the same
But we had some good times
Guess it's sad just the same

Posted by tocks! at 22:37

23 September 2006

halfhearted

If I surrender to this feeling
Maybe all the aches and pains will go
And I can close my eyes
Never again to have them open
Until I bleed out all I've been
But I don't want to be alone no more

Empty fields move me so much more
Than rooms filled up with friends
The way the trees look dead reminds me
That there's more to life than living
Maybe giving up's not bad
But part of letting go of you

Take this razor, sign your name accross my wrist
So everyone will know who left me like this
Sew me up, my scars run deep
A reminder not to forget the times that we've had

woohooo
sadistically
i like this emo song, it's so sadistic (:
bitch - so classic.
i like your emo song
it's schweet
i'll bring you out soon (:

Posted by tocks! at 00:58

romeo is bleeding

i am a money eating monster machine!
RWARRRR
its okay, i loveee to splurge and spend money on stupid things
that make me happeeee :D
overproductive shopping spree today and i blew, a lot of money ):
im currently in bop deficit = no more eating and more shopping
OVERPRODUCTIVE ((:

my brain is a maze
i cant find my way out
it's like living in a daze
yay rhymes
feelings i cant comprehend
forbidden thoughts
it's like the apple tree in the garden of eden

FUN FACT :
humans share 98.5% of DNA with chimpanzees
75% with dogs
50% with fruit flies
and 33% daffodils!!
HOHOHOHO!
1/3 of me is made up of daffodils!
so technically its the 1.5% of DNA that makes us humans
and not chimps!
wooolala
this is the knowledge you get from watching excessive teevee
namely discovery channel (:

There's a heart that must be free to fly
That burns with a need to know the reason why
Why must we all conceal what we think how we feel
Must there be a secret me I'm forced to hide?

Posted by tocks! at 00:29

21 September 2006

so kiss me goodbye

decreased brain activity by the minute
im tired, and i like feeling tired (:
it makes me feel like ive had hellalot of fun the entire day
such that im emotionally and physically drained.
okay i did have fun chillin' :D

dig out my brains and gorge out my heart
i have full intention of enjoying postprelims
with no traces of guilt and other emotionally downturning feelings.

every moment spent away from her is like the cold blistering winter
where the sun is waiting for the first flower to bloom
that must be the sweetest thing i've heard in an awfully long time
and it's not even scripted
like, wow.

I want to spend the whole night in your eyes

Posted by tocks! at 23:51

we are dreaming

im attempting to squeeze in as many people as possible
into the postprelims activities
yummy dose of the liquidkitchen last night :D
good company, nice medicine drink /:
and doyouneedhelp plus canihaveamcspicydouble moments
retail therapy works. period.
its the joy of careless splurging that brings about an adrenaline rush

im plagued by bouts of depression
postexam depression maybe?
maybe its the maybe
how can i be genuinely smiling and feel all knotted up inside

i hate the tinge of smoke in my clothes, my hair
and IN MY AIR !
HAH it rhymes (:

Through our joy, through our pain
We can move worlds again
Take my hand, dance with me

Posted by tocks! at 10:37

19 September 2006

Posted by tocks! at 16:54

remember me

my childhood memories : D

Posted by tocks! at 14:49

destiny

more mindless fillups please.

I have read a book before
I have ran more than 2 miles without stopping
I have been to Canada
I have been on some sort of sports team
I have watched cartoons for hours before
I have tripped UP the stairs
I have fallen down an entire flight of stairs
I have been snowboarding/skiing
I have played ping pong
I swam in the ocean
I have been on a whale watch
I have seen fireworks
I have seen a shooting star
I have seen a meteor shower
I have almost drowned
I have been so embarrassed I wanted to disappear
I have listened to one cd over & over & over again
I have had stitch(es)
I have licked a frozen pole and got stuck there
I have stayed up til 6am doing homework/projects
I currently have a job
I have been ice skating
I have been rollerblading
I have fallen flat on my face
I have tripped over my own two feet
I have been in a fist fight
I have played videogames/com for more than 3 hours straight
I have watched The Power Rangers before
I have played truth or dare
I have already had my 16th birthday
I have already had my 17th birthday
I've called someone stupid. And i meant it.
I've been in a verbal argument
I've cried in school
I've played basketball on a team
I've sung in a choir
I've danced in a group
I've done cheerleading on a team
I've swam on a team
I've been swimming more than 20 times in my life
I've bungee jumped
I've climbed a rock wall before
I've lost more than $20
I've called myself an idiot
I've called someone else an idiot
I've cried myself to sleep
I've had (or have) pets
I've owned a Spice Girls cd. and or tape
I've owned a Britney Spears cd
I've owned an N*Sync cd
I've owned a Backstreet Boys cd
Ive mooned someone
I've sworn at someone in authority
I've been in the schoolnewspaper/insights
I've been on TV
I've eaten sushi
I've been on the other side of a waterfall
I've watched all of the Lord of the Rings movies
I've watched all the Harry Potter movies
I've watched the 3 Stooges at least once
I've watched "Newlyweds" Nick & Jessica
I've watched Looney Tunes before
I've been stuffed into a locker
I've been called a geek
I've studied hard for a test and got a bad grade
I've not studied at all for a test and aced it
I've met a celebrity / music / TV artist
I've written poetry
I've been arrested
I've been attracted to someone much older than me
I've been tickled till I've cried
I've tickled someone else until they cried
I've had / have siblings
I've been to a rock concert
I've listened to classical music and enjoyed it
I've been in a play
I've cried in front of my friends
I've read a book longer than 1,000 pages
I've freaked out over a sports game
I've vomited in public
I've washed someone elses vomit
I've ran away
Ive had a stalker
I've had a fight with someone on text
I've had a fight with someone face-to-face
I've been on a car accident
I've forgiven someone who has done something bad to me
I've personally seen something die
I've been confronted by a police officer but got away
I've lost someone who meant the world to me
I've had crashed a party
I've been a member of a school office
I've been suspended

being grown up isnt half as fun as growing up
these are the best days of our lives
the only thing that matters is just following your heart
and eventually you'll finally get it right

Posted by tocks! at 01:14

17 September 2006

cartoon heroes

i am devastated!!
i've lost my dearest companion ):
it is GONE
after being hand in hand for the past many many papers
it is now GONE
where is my chewable pen!! ):
with my lion sticker! RWARRR
come home soon blackg2 ):
for those who dont understand why i'm making sucha big fuss over a pen
it is simply due to the fact that i am the sort of person
who uses a single pen for everything
work, DOODLING, writting letters, and CHEWING
sighh, this is one great loss

i'm running circles round my head honestly
physical geog paper tomorrow
im no where near completing anything
BUT THEN AGAIN
i happily drew up a shopping list while reading up on tropical soils
BLEARGGHH
that goes to show that i am OHSOWORRIED about my future
to hell with prelims

And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming
Or the moment of truth in your lies
When everything seems like the movies
Yeah you bleed just to know your alive

Posted by tocks! at 18:49

15 September 2006

hearthrob

i cant decide if maths paper 1 was good or bad
half good half bad
its better to not take a stand.

my head is throbbing
heavy from the workload ):
maths is just BAD for the brains!

I need you like mercy from heaven' gate
There's a freedom in your arms
That carries me through
I need you

Posted by tocks! at 23:03

rhythms and blues

you know i cant remember who said this
the only thing that is constant is change
changes will always happen

i suppose some things are better off unexplained
we will always see our own side of the story
and fail to understand the flip side of the coin
in that way, life is sad

maths tomorrow, i can't wait to get it over and done with
even if im gonna fail
at least that's another paper down
i'm too tired to think
slow traffic ahead.

If you believe in magic, come along with me
We'll dance until morning 'til there's just you and me

Posted by tocks! at 00:47

14 September 2006

how's yer ma!

so we broke the record
fighting, for the first time.
fcuk you
i thought that you above anyone else would understand.
apparently i thought wrong
why are you pushing me to something i'm not ready for
call me weak, but i need my time
and i will not live in denial.

Posted by tocks! at 00:01

12 September 2006

x marks the spot

so i believed that i could deal
and that i would be okay
apparently i overestimated myself
cos i am not okay, not at all.
i made promises that things will be okay
that no friendships will be harmed
and that everything will be the way it was
i'm sorry, that's one promise i feel that i am incapable of keeping

and yet, i fear that history repeat itself
so fearful that i'm lost
in this jungle where the human hearts dangle on vines
i'm completely lost, bewildered.

time heals all wounds,
so it just takes time.
but in the meantime, what?

maybe i could just disappear.
and see, this time it's entirely my own fault
i'm a fucktard.

i studied labour market and market failure
from 1030 -530.
thats seven hours, hahh.
two topics, screw econs.

hahahha, this cheered me up a little.

Now I sit me down to study
I pray the Lord I won't go nutty
And if I fail to learn this junk
I pray the Lord that I won't flunk

But if I do, don't pity me at all
Just lay my bones down in the study hall
Tell my teacher I've done my best
Then pile my books upon my chest

Now I lay me down to rest
I pray I'll pass tomorrow's test
If I should die before I wake
That's one less test I'll have to take.

Posted by tocks! at 20:09

take heart sweet heart

geography was okay
i should be worried for everything else though,
considering how i devoted the entire week to that single paper
that is as of now, o-v-e-r
watching top model always gives me the urge to strut around
and to pretend that i'm wearing something dressy
instead of that tatty ratty big shirt (:

i noticed this embrassingly HUGE grammatical error in my previous post
i shall not correct it.

i also notice that i'm the only one that still blogs everyday
worrying, indeed.

but when you're coasting along and nobody's trying too hard
you can turn around and like where you are

Posted by tocks! at 00:42

10 September 2006

fairydust

after catching parts of 13goingon30
for yes, the first time yesterday
i must say that its saddening how as humans,
we try to grow up so quickly
and then feel like reversing time again to where we cannot go
everytime i see some prepubescent girls in town
decked out in full gear - heels, skimpy tops, mini skirts
and looking like they experimented with their mum's makeup collection
part of me wonders if they will regret it one day,
for rushing ahead and throwing themselves deep into adulthood
when they could be having kiddier fun ):
i suppose its a phase, there was probably a point of time
where i too rushed to grow up
luckily i stopped in time
that probably explains my childish demeanour now
i still wish i was sixteen, so young
as compared to the seventeen going on eighteen part ):
apparently im not the only one who wishes to use the time machine.
i think when you're old, you wish to be young
but when you're young you can't wait to grow up
completely reflective of human nature - what we have is never good enough

im starting to enjoy being alone
solitary comforts me
it allows me to think what i want to
believe in all i want to
and see what i want to
basically, it allows me to be selfish and get wrapped up in my own world
it's like dreaming, no one can hold you back.
i suppose the hard part is when you get chucked back into reality
for now, i'll rather not dread about what will happen
when im forced to face up to the real world

but god knows, if i could turn back time
there's only one thing i would do
live life on the fast lane
and never allow what ifs to happen
never.

one down, three to go
gosh, how i wish everyone was right.

Get a load of me, get a load of you
Walkin' down the street, and I hardly know you
It's just like we were meant to be

Posted by tocks! at 13:42

09 September 2006

you'll always be there

i've decided to dedicate a post to sir funnybone
whose antics ensure a never boring day in class
and whose wiseness below all that nonsense hair products,
dense canopy growth and dimples
have made life bearable, in strange ways (:
cheers to being 18 wong mcron
next time we dont need to sneak around if we want to watch m18 shows anymore
unlike what we did for the gigolo show :D
and like i said, if you don't get off the shelf
i'll push you. remember to visit!
happy birthday (:

Posted by tocks! at 12:09

08 September 2006

take flight

"When will you be home?"
she asks as we watch the planes take off
We both know we have no clear answer to where my dreams may lead
She's watched me as i crawled and stumbled
As a child, she was my world
And now to let me go, I know she bleeds
and yet she says to me

You can fly so high
Keep your gaze upon the sky
I'll be prayin every step along the way
Even though it breaks my heart to know we'll be so far apart
I love you too much to make you stay
Baby fly away

Autumn leaves fell into spring time and silver-painted hair
Daddy called one evening saying "We need you. Please come back"
When I saw her laying in her bed
Fragile as a child
Pale just like an angel taking flight
I held her as I cried

You can fly so high
Keep your gaze upon the sky
I'll be prayin every step along the way
Even though it breaks my heart to know we'll be so far apart
I love you too much to make you stay
Baby fly away
ohh... I love you too much to make you stay
Baby fly away

i just found out recently that it's a depressing song
but it holds so much truth about a mother's love.
or just love in general actually.
i think iloveyous are used too generously and too loosely
i suppose its just a social norm that we're used to
it's always nice to express your love and concern
but honestly in the genuine way
i think its used too casually
who are you, in your 18/20 years of life to speak of love?
just a casual thought (:

hun
1. i think its retarded how we're both capricorns, so technically should have similar character traits but we turn out so different. screw the stars
2. no chicken wing or fries or heart attack food for one day.
3. dirty green - reflective of all the soil coloured tops you wear
4. your eyes can talk
5. first three months in your class, when you were sleeping on the table
6. horse - need i say more?
7. would it have made a difference?

Posted by tocks! at 23:51

cynical

being back in sn today
brought back sweet memories
the ease of being in place so familiar was overwhealming
it's like walking in the path that's been forgotten
covered by the weeds and fungi that appeared over night
but it's just, there.
hard to explain but it felt good.
eased the strained nerves a little (:
a little suprised by how at home i felt back there
despite being away for so long
i suppose ten years really makes a difference
the school's been repainted
but that memories is set so deep such that no matter where i turned
the images of blue white and pink paint still appeared (:

and it was so quiet, i managed to study
today felt like the only productive day in the entire week (:
tranquility, serenity, peace.

and the only thing that stays constant now
is the knowledge that i really really want to give up studying
oh well, i cant.
other than that all feelings, thoughts and things just keep changing
i suppose time never slows down
or halt even the slightest moment
and if we stop moving
we'll fall off, just like running on a treadmill
there's no stopping
you just have to keep going (:

over the rooftops a plane in the sky
beat of a bass drum cars passing me by
under a bridge dark then back into light

Posted by tocks! at 19:53

07 September 2006

deafening silence

i was just looking at friendster
and i can't help feel guilty
for my evilness in the past
unintentionally of course, but still evil
oh well, we all learn.

FELICIA JIANG
i swear we need to talk more
you make me happy ((:
really, really happy.
hahahas
curiosity killed the cat
but it's okay, i dont mind getting killed

and once again i miss the class ):
you never know dear, how much i miss you
please don't take my sunshine away!!
and jepenga, homie girls!
we need to hang outtt
HANG HANG HANG!
it's just one of those days when you miss everybody ):

If i lay here
If i just lay here
would you lie with me
and just forget the world

Posted by tocks! at 20:36

chasing cars

The 99 club.

Once upon a time, there lived a King who,
despite his luxurious lifestyle, was neither happy nor content.
One day, the King came upon a servant who was singing happily while he worked.
This fascinated the King; why was he,
the Supreme Ruler of the Land, unhappy and gloomy,
while a lowly servant had so much joy in his heart?

The King asked the servant, "Why are you so happy?"
The man replied, "Your Majesty, I am nothing but a servant, but my family and I don't need too much - just a roof over our heads and warm food to fill our tummies."
Later in the day, the King sought the advice of his most trusted advisor.
After hearing the King's woes and the servant's story, the advisor said,
"Your Majesty, I believe that the servant has not been made part of The 99 Club."
"The 99 Club? And what exactly is that?" the King inquired.
The advisor replied, "Your Majesty, to truly know what The 99 Club is, place 99 Gold coins in a bag and leave it at this servant's doorstep."
When the servant saw the bag, he took it into his house.
When he opened the bag, he let out a great shout of joy... so many gold coins!
He began to count them.
After several counts, he was at last convinced that there were 99 coins.
He wondered, "What could've happened to that last gold coin?
Surely, no one would leave 99 coins!"
He looked everywhere he could, but that final coin was elusive.
Finally, exhausted, he decided that he was going to have to work harder than ever to earn that gold coin and complete his collection.
From that day, the servant's life was changed.
He was overworked, horribly grumpy,
and castigated his family for not helping him make that 100th gold coin.
He stopped singing while he worked.
Witnessing this drastic transformation, the King was puzzled.
When he sought his advisor's help, the advisor said,
"Your Majesty, the servant has now officially joined The 99 Club."

He continued, "The 99 Club is a name given to those people who have enough to be happy but are never contented, because they're always yearning and striving for that extra 1 to round it out to 100!
We can be happy, even with very little in our lives, but the minute we're given something bigger and better, we want even more!
We lose our sleep, our happiness, we hurt the people around us;
all these as a price for our growing needs and desires.
That's what joining The 99 Club is all about."

Posted by tocks! at 12:33

06 September 2006

double crossed

the words we speak have a direct and definite effect upon our thoughts.
thoughts create words, for words are the vehicles of ideas.
but words also affect thoughts and help to condition if not to create attitudes.
in fact, what often passes for thinking starts with talk.
therefore if the average conversation is scrutinised and disciplined
to be sure that it contains peaceful expressions,
the result will be peaceful ideas and ultimately a peaceful mind.

i read that in a book, and i think it makes complete sense.
so why is it that we allow ourselves to casually comment
and even speak of "just saying only!"
that's never the truth, is it.
world peace

I don't know how or why
I feel different in your eyes
All I know is that it happens everytime

Posted by tocks! at 19:56

candy coated prison bars

jan

1. i love your hair even if it makes you look OLD and AHMA-ish
i think it flatters you (:
2. replace all the salt you eat with sugar for a day
3. bikini fire engine red
4. unassuming and so easy to get along-ness
5. in our lousy maths table in sec3, with nat me you and whowasit?
6. hyperactive small dog :D schnauzer!
7. how do you always manage to make life look so easy?

everyone, go visit!
http://screamingoutforyou.blogspot.com/

Posted by tocks! at 17:42

slow shuffling shoes

tag! and..
1. I'll respond with something random about you.
2. I'll challenge you to try something.
3. I'll pick a colour that I associate with you.
4. I'll tell you something I like about you.
5. I'll tell you my first/clearest memory about you.
6. I'll tell you what animal you remind me of.
7. I'll ask you something I've always wanted to ask you.
8. You must post this on yours.

wanxin
1. you've got a beeeggg butt (:
2. pick up after yourself for one day - that means no clothes, no towels, no phones and work lying around
3. black BLACK face!
4. that you listen and always pinch me awake from daydreams
5. NONE
6. donkeyy
7. how do you keep it all bottled up?

bangsat
1. you make me happy when you sing, know that?
2. no cursing and swearing for one day
3. olive green
4. how you're like a big baby younger brother ( I AM THE OLDER ONE :D )
5. walking to dhoby gaut mrt station, when i told you (or so you claim) that i hated geog
6. monkey faceee
7. what's your three fold utopian dreammm :D

ant
1. you should live your entire life the way you're living it now - slacking and POSTIVE thinking
2. i dare you to admit the truth one day after you allow closure to seep in.
3. black, grey and all shades of darkness.
4. your bitchiness, it's classic
5. when you were in your ballet leotard, and across the fence.i think i shook your hand between the slices of the fencing.
6. cat - absolutely unpredictable
7. whatever made you go all "satanic-ish" that year?

cheesy days make me go :DD
#1
flinger: i could weird sense of weird la
flinger : weird sense of humor i mean
me : HAHAHAHAHAAAA!

#2
blue glittery sistaa: like you know when you ask a small kid to draw a girl?
and the small little girl in the cute dress with the ribbon that he will draw? that's you

two-minute hailstorm then melts into rain
sing me a rainbow it's sunny again
swallows overhead while the traffic snarls below
could I keep dreaming for a little while longer

Posted by tocks! at 12:12

05 September 2006

heartbreak season

tag! and..
1. I'll respond with something random about you.
2. I'll challenge you to try something.
3. I'll pick a colour that I associate with you.
4. I'll tell you something I like about you.
5. I'll tell you my first/clearest memory about you.
6. I'll tell you what animal you remind me of.
7. I'll ask you something I've always wanted to ask you.
8. You must post this on yours.

van
1. i think you'll love absolutely lovely in a low back dress
2. i dare you to eat 3 portions of cheesefries at a go
3. dark sexy red
4. your "say no to starving myself skinny" attitude
5. at sentosa, when i thought to myself "i'll never be able to be friends with her"
you scared the shit outta me babe.
6. an egghead, oh wait thats not an animal! :P
7. tell me all your impressions of me, right from the start and till now.

flinger - you tagged, i dont care im writing for you! :D
1. i think you look cute in the braces
2. no chilli for a whole week (:
3. red and orange - spain!
4. im glad you eat fast
5. getting to know you during 1st three months, at the lect staircase when pam introduced me.
"oh hi, im libing"
6. garfield, its something about your laugh
7. how the hell do you readharry/draco?

kevin
1. i think your best smile is the your laughing smirk
2. no nescafe for one day - sure die! (and im not even daring you to not fold your worksheets and towel and clothes and ... )
3. blue glitter, and its your own fault
4. your dramaness, you have the makings of a drag queen honeyy
5. that arrogant prat fencer who knows his stuff, but there's something mysterious about him...
WHAHAHHAHAS. i'll explain someday.
6. golden retriever!
7. have we ever fought?? i cant remember.

Posted by tocks! at 14:21

closure, finally

and so as this saga draws to an end
i'll keep praying that this turns out to be happy
i suppose this is as best an ending as we can all wish for
"the action of one will influence all the others"
and i promise this will not spoil anything at all.
i sincerely thank all those who've been so annoyingly supportive
and constantly allowing me to scream, whine, cry to them
medicine - i dont really hate you for being brutally honest, and i've seen a new side of you it's surprising!
bestfriend aka the sweet after the medicine - for listening to me cry at three am, you deserve the title
sista#1 - lubjoo sista, denial is a river in africa!
sista#2 - we'll take a photo, and it wont be for my dartboard
the rest of the support group - thank you for iloveyou messages and hugs and being supportive (so cliche!)
ungrumper - i've said all that i needed to in those messages (:

the bruised knees will heal in time.
dont they always?

to those who don't know, i just beg that you dont probe
much as some of you may worry, DONT!
just know that it's still me! :D

In my dreams
I'll always see you soar above the sky
In my heart there will always be a place for you for all my life
I'll keep a part of you with me
And everywhere I am there you'll be

Posted by tocks! at 13:50

04 September 2006

i hope you dance

you know that kind of feeling
where you're half dreading, half anticipating what lies ahead
and yet knowing that you're gonna have to face it
i'm all jittery and strung-up
but afraid of what i know i'll hear.
allow me this one last indulgence.

I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance
Never settle for the path of least resistance
Living might mean taking chances
But they're worth taking
Lovin' might be a mistake
But it's worth making
Don't let some hell bent heart leave you bitter
When you come close to selling out, reconsider
Give the heavens above more than just a passing glance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
I hope you dance

edit// you know what's funny
i googled for inspirational quotes
the first link i found cracked me up
i suppose god works through the strangest ways possible.

http://www.inspirationpeak.com/

Posted by tocks! at 10:10

03 September 2006

plastic crown

there's no good and evil, only power and those who are too afraid to seek it.
-lord voldermort

i think im going over to the dark side (:
i swear i have tendencies to live by harrypotter

Posted by tocks! at 16:47

02 September 2006

escapism

sometimes i wish i could actually say all that i wanted to say on my blog
with it being created to somewhat act as a diary
but i come to realise that the fact that its on the www
and that half the world has complete access to it
goes to show that its probably not a diary
and the realisation that every selfish word you say here
may cause a bomb explosion elsewhere
theres no freedom of expression anymore
so technically the blog has lost its purpose

i havent been myself these days
and i blame it all on exams and other stressful situations
and like my recently adopted elder brother says
" i hate your ): and life sucks "
i know, i hate them too.
and more than not
i tend to blame myself for feeling inferior
for feeling so inadequate
for making my life sound more miserable than it is
when in actual fact
there are people who are starving out there
others whose daily thoughts are whether they'll get caught in the crossfire of a civil war
and for sounding like i do.
okay maybe i should just stop blogging so much
and quit living in this lalaland of the cyberworld
plus to stop letting some nerdy fucker behind a computer screen
generating the daily horoscopes affect my behaviour

Unforgettable in every way
And forever more, that's how you'll stay
That's why, darling, it's incredible
That someone so unforgettable
Thinks that I am unforgettable too

Posted by tocks! at 20:07

01 September 2006

descent to hell

i looked at the cover of a book today
i saw a face - not smiley, just a face
to most otheres, they saw it as a switch
it actually is a switch
i suppose life pretty much works the same way
the same life may be interpreted differently by different people
the same words, same picture
are not the same to everyone
there's always the flip side of the coin to think about
which goes to my point - technology may have improved our standard of living
but it may not have improved our quality of lives
an excellent example would be sms-ing
sometimes you come to realise the same words
can be taken completely differently
the essence of conversation not only lies in the words said
but also the tone and attitude right?
and even in a phone conversation
the body language similarly cannot be expressed
i suppose face to face conversations are the best

the wise younger sister of my says that
the only reason a favourite song is a favourite song
is because you can relate to the lyrics
i suppose its rather true.
not completely and 100% foolproof
but it seems to hold for most of the time

We sat and watched the sun go down
Picked a star before we lost the moon
Youth is wasted on the young
Before you know its come and gone too soon